I want to talk to the men this morning; but ladies I want you to hear this as well, because it involves you too. God has given us an institution of divine grace! An institution that causes us to leave selfishness and pride at the door. It's the institution of marriage [holy matrimony]. See marriage is beautiful covenant union that God has blessed us with. Not only has He saved us from our sins through the finished work of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, He has also blessed with the gift of marriage as He gives us His daughters. So my question for you husbands is this! Have you thanked the Lord for your wife lately? Seriously, have you ever stopped and did that? Thank the Lord for your good wife, because He is the one who gave her to you. John Newton had these words to say when he wrote to his wife Polly “It is no wonder if so many years, so many endearments, so many obligations have produced such an uncommon effect, that by long habit, it is almost impossible for me to draw a breath, in which you are not involved.” I don't know if anyone has ever better summarized the beauty of marriage in one sentence. But sadly the flip- side is that we live in a culture that says “marriage is trouble” one lady wrote “The "Four D's of marriage" are "depression, despair, drink and divorce." So sad to read a statement like that, not only is it offensive and blatantly wrong…..it attacks the very fabric that God ordained for the marriage and the family. We live in a culture that parents can’t wait to get there children out of the house for good, and have no concern who they get shacked up with down the road. There are father’s out there, that have no problem allowing some strange young man, they don’t know, take out there precious gift from God, but will put up a fight and say “over my dead body before I let you have the keys to my automobile, boat or fill in the blank yourself.” Does a father or parent realize what that says about their child? [Better yet, God’s daughter]. When a father makes a statement like that; what their really saying is“my material possession are more valuable to me then my child.”
May this never be men in our home! Girls, ladies, women are God’s daughters and we need to treat them as such! My lovely wife and I have 4 beautiful daughters, and the last thing I’m going to do is hand them over to man, a boy who doesn't know, honor, practice and love the Lord with all his heart, mind and soul through the gospel that saves to the uttermost parts. I refuse to listen to this culture when it comes to my family about when we are to let go of our daughters! We, meaning my wife and I will continue to follow the patriarchs found in Scripture! Why? God knows his daughters best and He has instilled this responsibility to me and my wife. These daughters are my gifts from God and they will be treated as such and when that time comes we will give them over to the person of God’s choosing. Remember these are God’s daughters [I want to you to think about that] and marriage is a divine ordained blessing from God!
God said “man can’t live alone”…….so He solved that problem by creating Eve [woman] a “Helper” out of a rib from Adam’s side! It’s interesting that God took a rib from Adam and not a piece from his foot like a heel…….because she was to be someone who Adam was to cling to not trample over. Men, our wives are a special gift from God……by God’s divine providence He has given you a wife. To make it planner for us! He has allowed you to take His daughters hand to care for, love and honor her whether by life or death. So I think its appropriate daily to thank the Lord [your Heavenly Father] for your wife. Prov 18:22 says “He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD. This is not because of your good looks, fortune, or fame! But God knows what you need to glorify Him and He knows who suits you best. Unlike this fallen generation around us that gets married for all the wrong reasons and crumble apart. It is by the Lord that a man is matched with a woman." There is a special providence that watches over marriage.
See, we hear people all around us say “It’s a match or marriages made in heaven." "They were meant to be together!" But marriages of convenience, marriages made in consideration of worldly means, are a mere earthly arrangement, and claim no particular grace from God. Jay Adams said “Marriage is not a bargain in which each partner says, 'I will give so much in return for so much.' Each vows to give all that is necessary to meet his or her spouse's need for companionship, whether or not he or she receives anything in return. Therefore, the only question is, 'Are you fulfilling your vows?'" Many marry for what they can get out of the marriage; but that is lust, not love, and is biblically untenable.” This world is destined to fail, because this fallen world doesn't understand the blessed union of what marriage is for? For our good and proper foundation for the family and ultimately for God’s glory. Not to say our marriages won’t have rocky times…………………BECAUSE THEY WILL! The beauty of it all, is that during those rocky times we’re always reminded of the Cross, and the grace that flowed through Calvary somewhere along the road! Let’s be honest! You’re a sinner who married a sinner, but by His mercy and grace, you have been given something this fallen world can’t understand forgiveness and God’s blessing upon your life and marriage. She is a special gift of God, a proof of His gracious care for His servant. Do you hear that men! She is a gift from God! Not a burden, a ball in chain, an object to control or a second class citizen. She is a gift!
Prov 12:4 says “An excellent wife is the crown [a joy and gladness] of her husband…” A wife that is loving and pure, constant and faithful, submissive to him; that is diligent in the affairs of her house. Takes care of her family, brings up her children, and keeps up a good order is an honor and credit to her husband. And what’s more amazing is that it “comes from God” The Bible says that a prudent wife comes from LORD……… in Prov 19:14. It means that God has done such a work in her heart, and because she's a born-again Christian and loves the Lord. God has entrusted you to lead His daughter daily back to Him, and we find it through the expression of how Christ loved the church. Turn in your bibles to Ephesians chapter 5
SIMPLY LOVE YOUR WIFE (V25)
This is a self-sacrificial love [unconditional love] without all the huffing and puffing and thinking that’s not a manly thing to do; but in all honesty, this is exactly what God is telling you do as man of God. It’s the same sacrificial love that Christ showed the church. Christ gave everything He had for the church and we are to do likewise for her. Why? She is God’s daughters!
SET HER APART BECAUSE SHE IS SPECIAL AND PRICELESS. (V26-V27)
Not only are we display sacrificial love but we are also commanded to care for her with a purifying love. Since Divine love seeks to completely cleanse those of sin, we should do the same. Husbands shouldn't bear the thought of anything sinful in the life of his wife that displeases a holy God. Husbands it’s our responsibility that we help to encourage her to conform more into the image of Christ. We are never to be a hindrance or and obstacle to her obedience to God. Why? She is God’s daughters!
HUSBANDS WE ARE TO CULTIVATE AND TREASURE HER (V28-V31)
Provide for her every need as a help to see her grow in her Christian walk. Proved affection that gives her not only comfort but security. A Christian husband is to care for His wife the same devotion that he naturally displays for himself. We are to show them honor as people and not things to control, have at our disposal or to abuse and exploit. This would be very dangerous for your soul. Peter said “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7. The best wife is a woman who loves God more than her husband….Why? The more she loves God the easier it is to love the sinner that God has placed in her life. Everything begins with our vertical relationship….not horizontally. Remember she is God’s daughter.
SO THE WARNING FOR US MEN IS THAT WE HAVE A BEEN GIVEN THE RESPONSIBILITY HANDED DONE WITH DIVINE PROVIDENTIAL CARE FOR HIS DAUGHTERS HERE ON EARTH. May we never take this wonderful responsibility lightly with our lack of care, selfishness or laziness! God has chosen this daughter for you and He expects you to live up to your responsibility as a leader in your home under all circumstances of life whether good or bad. We are not to follow after the culture that says “when times get tough or boring and you don't feel that spark and it’s time to move on.” Jay Adams calls this philosophy “flower flitters” He said “It’s that Playboy philosophy, love is getting; it means getting what one can of another person, using the person as an object for love. It means grasping and holding and satisfying oneself by using another. And when he [or she] is through using that person, well fine, she’s been used…up! That’s it. When there is no more nectar in the flower, the bee must flit to the next, and to the next, and one after that. Hollywood has taught this, too, not only by film but also by the way in which so many of the stars themselves have been notorious “flower flitters”. May this never be men in our marriages…….Why? They’re God’s daughters.
SO THE SUNDAY QUESTION IS! Why should I thank the Lord for my wife? Here is my list and I want you to do the same this week and read it to your wife......... the daughter of God.
- She is the one who is the love of my life.
- She is the one who is always faithful.
- She is the one who keeps me humble.
- She is the one who listens to me ramble on about things.
- She is the one who isn't great at sports
- She is the one who tries her best at them though
- She is the one who watches hockey with me "Go Leafs Go"
- She is the one who likes to be around me the most.
- She is the one who makes me frustrated sometimes.
- She is the one who makes me smile and laugh.
- She is the one who makes my favorite dish (English pasties).
- She is the one who goes above all that I could ask or think.
- She is the one who loves me unconditionally.
- She is the one who cares for me.
- She is the one who cares for our 5 beautiful children.
- She is the one who cries during the movies like "UP".
- She is the one who I couldn't live without.
- She is the one who I get to grow old with.
- She is the one who bares my sorrows and tears.
- She is the one who knows me best next to God.
- She is the one who loves the Lord with all her heart.
- She is the one who the bible speaks of in the Proverb's.
- She is my BEST FRIEND.
- And most importantly! SHE IS MINE. Thank you, Lord Jesus, for this gift of love in marriage.
Husbands love your wife as Christ loved the church! Husbands love your wife because she is the one whom God ordained for you! Husbands love your wife because she is special and precious in your life! Husbands love your wife because she is God’s daughter! If your a hurting wife………can I encourage you to always remember God never forgets a sorrow or tear, stay strong and wait upon Him in your marriage, and saturate your time in worship and prayer by praying for your husband. Single person…… be patient and wait on God’s leading in your life, He knows exactly what you need. Be patient and never lean on your own understanding, but trust in the Lord and He will bless you beyond your wildest dreams. Never rush into something that God hasn't prepared for you by His divine time table in your life. He knows you better than you know yourself. As James said in 1:17 “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” Remember that truth this morning husbands! Your wife is that perfect gift God gave to you from above……so treat her the way they’re supposed to be treated! I'm so thankful for the gift of marriage, He gave me a wife who loves me so much! A sinner undeserving of her love. Remember they’re God’s daughters and He has instructed us to love and care for them as Christ loved the church!